The Truth About Pivotal Conversations - Life.Church Leaders

The Truth About Pivotal Conversations

by Jeff Galley

You probably don’t know me, but I want to share some personal stories, so let’s get that out of the way. I’m Jeff Galley. I lead our LifeGroups and LifeMissions team at Life.Church. Basically, we try to create experiences that lead people to do the things Jesus would do. The Conversations Bible Plan and the free Conversations e-book come from the same intentions. You’ll see what I mean.

Have you ever had one of those conversations that, even though you may not have realized it at the time, you later recognized as a life-changing, “aha!” moment? You know, that visit over coffee with a trusted, wise friend, who helped you finally make an important decision. You probably tell people about this pivotal conversation when you talk about how you got to where you are.

Years ago, I had one of those. Even though I knew Dick was a seasoned business leader in an organization with global reach, I took a chance and asked him if he’d be willing to meet with me and give me some advice. The sage advice Dick expounded to me over that breakfast left an indelible imprint. I even remember what I ate!

Fortunately, we continued to meet, and Dick became a supremely helpful mentor to me. Our relationship changed the direction of my life. Dick passed away a few years ago, but I’ll never forget him.


What conversations do you remember? What we term “pivotal” conversations are often overrated. They matter, but I think we significantly inflate these memorable conversations. Wait … what? Yes, you read that right. It’s our natural tendency to overrate pivotal conversations.



My first conversation with Dick was important mostly because it established our relationship. But it was the 10, 20, or maybe even 100 ordinary conversations we had over the years that guided me most—like the three-minute visit in a hallway, a quick phone call, or one of the many scheduled times we met to talk over coffee.

What does this have to do with acting like Jesus, other than the fact that Jesus used ordinary, everyday conversations to mold his disciples and prepare them to launch the Christian faith? Remember when He told us—all of us—to go and make disciples? Everyday conversations are vital to the work Jesus commissioned us to do. To fulfill this co-mission with Christ, God has deliberately placed you in proximity to people He plans to restore. He needs them to be developed to their full potential so they can take part in His plans for the world. And what’s our best “disciple-making tool”? Our everyday conversations. So, I take it back, these conversations aren’t “ordinary” at all!

Pray: Holy Spirit, who is being shaped in my everyday conversations?

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