By: The LifeGroups Team

God created us to live life in community. That’s why LifeGroups are so important! They give us an opportunity to come together to celebrate with one another, pray with one another, encourage one another, and care for one another as the church. So how can you get the most out of your time together? How can you start actually having the deep conversations real friendship is made of?

While you shouldn’t expect to have a deep, earth-shattering conversation every week, it’s great to make deep conversations a regular part of your LifeGroup culture. But how do you do that? These four tips might help!

1. Set the tone. As the leader of the LifeGroup, you set the tone for how deep your LifeGroup will go. If you’d like conversation to transition from surface level topics, tell your group. Be up-front and honest about making your LifeGroup a space where people can rip off the mask and share what they are going through.
2. Go first. Part of setting the tone for deep conversations involves going first. It usually only takes one person to bravely share what they are really feeling for others to follow suit. So if you’d like to go deep, go first. You’ll be amazed at how being vulnerable not only helps you but also inspires others to share what’s really on their minds.
3. Ask deep questions. It takes thoughtful questions to get thoughtful answers. Ask unassuming, open-ended questions. Channel your curiosity and let that guide you to ask questions that spark openness—questions like, “Share something you’re learning about God in this season of your life.” or “Who is someone you admire? What do you admire about them?” Asking questions like that open the door to deeper conversations because it allows people to reflect on specific past experiences that they might not have shared otherwise.
4. Embrace the power of silence. Sometimes after you ask a deep question, you have to sit in silence for a bit. That’s okay! Don’t rush to fill the silence. Let people have time to process the question. It may feel uncomfortable, but it’s creating a space for people to think about their answer and work up the courage to share it.

Try these four tips the next time you meet, and see if you can take your conversation to a deeper level. It may take some time and some trial and error, but before long, you’ll be getting to know one another more than you thought possible.